To the cinema to see Piranha 3D, a new cinematic gross-out. This is the sort of film of which they used to say 'they don't make films like that any more'. Well, now they do. Rarely have I seen so much nudity and gore packed into 89 minutes. It is, obviously, in 3D - the cheap kind which is added after the film has been shot in 2D, and which betrays itself by the occasional appearance of the 2D 'ghost' of one characters seemingly appearing behind the 3D version. Most of the time, though, it is quite OK for purpose, and scores a 3D first as one of the female characters vomits messily into the camera. The plot, insofar as there is one, concerns an earthquake which releases prehistoric piranha from a hidden cavern into a lake full of vacationing youngsters. From that point on all we have to do is sit back as the cast are converted systematically into groundbait. An unexpected bonus is an nude underwater ballet by Kelly Brook and Riley Steele to the flower song from Delibes' Lakmé; it is erotic and at the same time beautiful.
I almost forgot another cinema first; the titles contain a credit for The Association of Amputee Surfers.
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